(An illustration on the thoughts of an abused girl)
The moment I
took my breath in relief, my soul could feel serene,
All the
colors and vibes, the stars and lights, it all emerged from within.
But what I
thought of those dark times, of how I thought it was over,
A big slap
of jokes was what it was, delusions caught me closer.
‘Let go’
were the words I yelled, but you held on to me tight,
Instead of
hugs you strangled me, and you knew you weren’t right.
Suffocated
much I was, for you thought to be an embrace,
Like a caged
bird I cried I fretted, and my heartbeats slowed its pace.
Giving up
seemed the only way, for the happening was off the beam,
No matter
how much I despised your touch, you heartlessly muffled my screams.
How ruthless
one could be, to live and not let live,
How
mercilessly your eyes gleamed, your grips they made me writhe.
Did it not
hurt you too, when you beat me black and blue?
Did your
heart not tremble at all, when you saw what you put me through?
It was the
night of ghouls, and your face painted in clown,
I’d feared
it from my infancy, an indication if I had known.
You ripped
off what I wore, killing every bounds of shame,
The colors
smeared on my skin, from a face that had no name.
You were
taking all I had, and the ceiling conversed with me,
The patterns
and the wallpaper, seemed intriguing than it should be.
For I opted
to zone out, from the brutal reality,
To save me
of disgust, or the pain you were causing me.
What I’d
give to the one I love, you wrenched it selfishly,
A savage you
were to me, unanswered went all my plea.
Foggy went
my vision, your painted face seemed blur,
Dizzy of the
blood in my throat, a nightmare I wished it were.
You bruised
my body of sores, of dishonor and disgrace,
But the scar
you put on my soul, can never be replaced.