I love you.

Tuesday, April 14, 2020


Hi!
Where do I start from and how do I?
The number of words my heart wants me to tell you
all at once
everything.

Your eyes, your smile, your presence, you
how cheesy would it sound if I’d try praising them all
but that’s when I panic
I can’t
I literally can’t
words and expressions betray me
when I need them the most
if only I could tell you how perfect you are
if only I could tell you the way you make me feel
if only I could drown in you in tacky flattery
because that’s what becomes of me 
when I am with you
weak in my knees
weak at my words
and that’s not it
strong at my heart
strong by my will
strong over every miseries
strong in love
I become the better version of me when I’m with you.

Let’s time machine to few years back
the time we never knew we existed
and like every other girls
I too had a notion of love.
The girls named their dream men in many
the knight in shining armor
the king of their dreams
the prince of their hearts
the missing piece of their puzzle
the batman to their Gotham.
I was the only one who was blank
I didn’t know what to name the silhouette of you
so I named you “Love”
the idea of the one and only
so I named you “Love”
you did exist somewhere and you must’ve been smiling that moment
so I named you “Love”
the urge to be carried and spun around with a kiss, who’d it be
I named you “Love”.

So hay, my dear “Love”
I was a stupid girl who wanted to fly
and I had a cape of my own
but never did it work
and never did let me fly.
Now that you’re here right in front of me
and I’ve been flying in your arms
like a desperate bird wanting to embrace the sharp winds and the blue skies
you are my blue sky
you are my sharp wind
you are my superman
you are what I call you
my “Love”

I love you.

- J

Her Golden Gown

Monday, April 13, 2020

Underneath the veil was a beautiful face,
pretty and bright,
but it wasn’t mine.
I remember your eyes, chocolate brown,
showed how blessed I was
for one more time I looked into them
and yours were looking at hers.
Her smile etched just like mine
when we used to dance
when we used to hug
now she swirls in her golden gown
living the dreams I dreamt.
I had loved you
I had known you
I know you
I know you’re scared, you’re anxious
you're hopeful
it’s okay now, she collected the pieces
that I never scattered
but the blames were on me
it’s okay now, I’ve collected myself.
I pray and wish every happiness to you
I pray her glow stays
I pray hers don’t fade like mine
I pray that you’ve have changed.

-Yogi

Butterflies

Monday, April 13, 2020

And just when she was giving up while cleaning the mess her heart had made, it was as if her hopes were on her side, she saw him.
Millions of butterflies she felt and millions of questions in her mind including, “Where were you all these years?”
Days came to weeks where she would hear him talk all day, weeks came to months where she knew how cute his dimple was or how his freckles made his smile even prettier. He was a beautiful boy.
Sad part was the fact that they’d never met. The fact that she missed him so much made her realize how love could actually play games. But, she believed, for he was the only one who melted her heart back together to whole, she believed that one day, soon enough, she would get to live in his warm embrace, forever. Nonetheless, he would sing at times, maybe many times, that’d make her giggle and blush. She was never happier.

The day finally arrived. Who else could’ve imagined her level of excitement. She put on her best dress, she took hours to do her makeup, to look perfect and cover her minute blemishes. She dolled herself up, to look beautiful for him, she got ready, for him.
The tingles and the shivers she felt as soon as she hopped in an uber, the few minutes’ travel made her dizzy, if only she could teleport. When she finally did reach the premise where he was in, she could feel choking in her own air.
She saw him.
His smile, his perfectly done hair, his dimple, his wears, HIM, she finally saw him.
The first thing she could actually directly say was “I love you”.
He didn’t hear it the first time, so she screamed “I LOVE YOU” again, in the loudest way possible. Along with all the girls and the crowd, the pushing and the stumbles, she kept screaming “I LOVE YOU” while he was on stage, singing her favorite songs.
Her voice never made it to him, her voice drowned in the screams.
She couldn’t realize the time going by, the time when he finished his last song. He bowed, thanked the crowd, blew kisses, he left.
She loved him dearly but she was just another girl in the crowd.

- Yogi